The developmental psychologist Emmy Werner wanted to understand the significance of difficult childhood experiences on adult functioning. She studied this question by following a group of children over 30 years.
Here is what she found:
Adverse childhood events (ACE) impact the trajectory of well-being in adulthood.
Children who had complicated illnesses at birth, or suffered abuse were more likely to develop learning disabilities and mental health problems.
Here is the hope - she also found that 1/3 of all these children rose above their difficult childhoods to become empathetic, kind, and emotionally well-adjusted adults.
You may be asking yourself what was the difference? How can a child with such a rough start, persist and show such resilience?
They had at least one caring adult in their lives. This adult could be a teacher, a neighbour, a coach… This person was a source of caring support.
They were able to gain this support by being open or direct about their challenges. This directness seemed to help them elicit the support they were lacking.
If child abuse or adverse childhood experiences are part of your story, you may benefit from trauma therapy.
One of the tools I use is accelerated resolution therapy or ART.
ART is a type of therapy that uses eye movements to help the brain process and heal from trauma.
Trauma can cause our nervous system to get stuck in a state of crisis (fight/flight/freeze).
This hyperarousal can lead to anxiety, depression, or other mental health effects.
ART helps the brain reprocess the memory and reduces its emotional intensity.
It can be like a signal to the nervous system that the danger is over.
Reaching out for support is a courageous act. If you are struggling, ART therapy may be worth exploring.